Lies, Scandal and Cheating Icebergs

Some of this is going to seem made up. Most of it is not.

So as pretty much everyone in the entire world has heard by now, Palin’s’ daughter is preggers. By a kid around 17 or 18, who, the family assures us, she is going to marry. Since that fixes it all, of course. Who has a MySpace page that says (gasp) “I don’t want kids!” Oh noes! That obviously means he eats them instead!

No, this doesn’t really indicate how she’d be as VP, but it does show a bit about McCain and Palin. Yeah, Palin has a nice personal story. But she has very little experience on the national stage, and McCain had to know that but he, for whatever reason, picked her anyway. Doesn’t speak well of his judgment. Doesn’t speak well of her that she knew all this crap that, unfairly or not, was out there, waiting to be analyzed.

So did she assume it wouldn’t come out? Was she or was she not vetted? NY Times expressed doubts in a story today. Either way, what irritates me is that Bristol is 17 and can’t escape being a pawn in the political agenda. First, she was almost certainly raised with “abstinence only until marriage. Let no man drill in your Alaskan Wildlife Refuge before then.” Then she gets pregnant, and of course probably had no options other than keeping it. Maybe she didn’t want them. It wouldn’t surprise me if she considers abortion a bad and terrible thing (I did at 17 because I had yet to form my own opinions on it). But she’s still being a pawn because now people in the GOP are using her to say “Look she chose life! Yay! Nevermind that our abstinence only thing doesn’t work! The important thing is she chose life after we told her not to do the thing that led to this life-choosing miracle moment!”

I can see McCain’s people huddled up now, trying to figure out a way to spin this. “It’s like Father of the Bride II, except with family values and honor and country first!” Sigh.

Also, note US Weekly’s cover. A freakin’ VP candidate on the cover. I thought the Obamas was surprising, but now Palin? Lordy. Guessing that’s just a stock photo and she didn’t actually give them an interview. But I love “Babies Lies and Scandal.” US Weekly must have (pick two) lies/sex/scandal/cheating/heartbreak on the cover, followed by a third word of choice. For instance, “Peanut Butter, Lies and Heartbreak” works. As does “Cheating, Sexing and Waffle Irons.”

Workout tips are also good. In fact, I believe US Weekly’s highest-selling issue ever was the famed “Babies, Bacon and Boinking: How to Get Your Body Back after All Three” issue.

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3 Comments

Filed under Media Whore, News

3 responses to “Lies, Scandal and Cheating Icebergs

  1. LOL, you crack me up!

    But seriously, you made several good points. I was just saying to my boyfriend last night that if McCain can’t even pick a decent VP (and let’s face it, tabloid stuff aside, she’s not a good candidate), how can we trust him to make decisions of importance about the country?

    And that poor kid. I can only imagine how her family raked her over the coals for her sinning ways. Maybe if they’d given her a box of condoms and allowed her to choose to have safe sex, she wouldn’t have to “choose” to have a baby. Sad all around.

  2. Thanks, Zbornak. What I find interesting is, per her Wiki profile, Sarah eloped with Todd Palin Aug. 20 something of 1988. Her first son, Track, was born April 18, 1989. Hmm…did she find out she was pregnant and run off to the chapel? Or was he just premature? The world may never know. But she wouldn’t be the first parent to tell her kid to abstain when she didn’t do it herself.

  3. I’m still trying to wrap my head around when exactly politicians started treating US Weekly like a real magazine.

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